it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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