Its about making memories worth repressing
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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