Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
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