oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
