Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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