UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
