I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
