Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Holy sore nipples Batman
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize