her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
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