O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
