i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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