i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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