She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
