you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
