I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Randomize
