Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
