oh god the rape fog is back!
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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