Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
he shaved USA in his pubs
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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