Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
this boner is exhausting
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
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