ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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