I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
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