Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
