'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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