I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I want to make a zoo with you.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
So many bounce houses so little time
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
