My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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