it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
