READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
