Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
You were trust falling into bushes
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
