It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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