so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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