oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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