And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
You can't special order awesome
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I will pee on everything he values.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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