My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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