im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
