Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
