Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
