Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I touched a dick in church today
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize