I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
