So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize