Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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