THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
