I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
You need Xanax blowdarts
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
