I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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