They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Blood and glitter go together right?
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
