You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
