Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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