what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
