I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
