just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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