I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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