i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
